It Is All About Love
Tis a year now since you sat on the bed, looked at me and said, "it's all about self love".
Now the year has come and gone and a new one lies ahead. What a journey it has been. Yet the journey did not begin that day nor will it end tomorrow.
In the beginning was the word and it too was all about love. And yes it is wonderful to experience love for one's self. But to experience that love is to experience life. The joys, the sorrows, the heartache, the pain, as well as a few moments of bliss.
The experience also brings awareness of a far greater quest and the ultimate journey of enchantment.
It is beautiful to love one's self but it is a far greater joy to realize that we are loved by one's self.
Many times I have loved and lost. Moving on, the object of that love fading from my mind. I have often wondered why it is so different this time.
What is the magic that keeps opening my heart every time I have tried to shut you out?
Bitterness and disgust, how could life be so cruel. I should never have allowed myself to love you that much. No one is worth what I have gone through.
I am smiling now as my favorite Spanish phrase comes to mind "El Toro Pew Pew".
How many times I have said, this is bullshit, stop the bus, I want off. But the bus didn't stop and I knew to survive, I must go deeper within, to understand. What is the magic that keeps shinning through? Why am I still in love with you?
The magic is my soul loving me. The understanding is that all along it has been my soul loving you.
Through my words, through sharing and giving, I have experienced more joy than I can remember. I have become more aware of that love.
Through the heartache and rejection I have realized that love as never changing.
I have doubted, been angry and feared. Life, you and myself. Yet my soul has never wavered.
You once said to me "I love you more than you can ever imagine". Not true, because as much as my soul loves you, your soul loves me too.
I have often said that you have blessed my journey. Opportunity, understanding, experience, I need not say more. One of my greatest joys is knowing that I have blessed your journey too.
Beloved of my soul,
As your quest and journey continues, mine will too.
Things may change, experiences will differ. Whether at anytime we are apart or together, shall be determined by our spirits and the Will of Heaven.
The winds of heaven shall always dance between us, because my soul will always be loving you.
And life truly is
All about love
We are blessed, we are loved. May the New Year bring us only happiness and joy; there has been enough sorrow.
I Am thy pure creation Lord. I stand upon thy holy Word. See me through unto the end. Until one with thee I am once again.
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